Its farmday today, this is day where I get to catch up with my friends as we work on our kasmal kagarden. I purposefully left my phone at home just to see if I could survive a day without touching it.We had very loud arguments about relationships, kuomoka, religion and finally feminism.The latter was the loudest, the bitterest and one which I was most vocal and passionate about.
The guys started with the most famous case of the girl who sued two rugby players for rape, and how the internet went crazy with the #metoo movement. They then went ahead to make their point that the law is always on the girl's side in matters rape, domestic violence blah blah blah. I countered this with, the law will always follow the stats and if the stats state that in every 3 girls who are involved in coitus one is most likely raped, then without a doubt that is what judgement will be based on ofcourse with other issues like precedence and evidence.
Then we came to matters victimhood, where the most renowned feminists have to pull this card to garner favours or go aheads. Where anything and everything happening has to be connected to feminism and how females are undermined and how they need to stand up for themselves even when they are required to sit. How females will always play victim and take advantage of the fact that everyone is rooting for them.
On matters governance, the guys were very apt to highlight how we have women representatives but we will always have charity fundraisers to buy pads for the girlchild. It honestly could be easier if those women reps would make propsitions for decommercialisation ( this is not a real word but issa free world ey!)of sanitary towels and make them easily available just like condoms. How we still have slots for salaried nominees who literally play the role of substitutes in a game. But atleast substitutes step in at some point.
We argued a little bit on the the schooling system, how females get to join campus with lower cluster points, how females are congratulated and rewarded for studying and attending school (college will show different stats). How when a female comes out and talks about her trauma or rape she is considered strong whereas on the other side the guy is considered weak. How we want equal opportunities and chances but will not blink an eye at equal responsibility.
How a guy working at a fast food restaurant is considered a failure but if it were a female she could be called strong and independent and if she is a single mum with a son the better. How we applaud women for literally existing.How we will always call our mothers strong and our fathers hardworking.
Yes, boys and men also get raped,they get sidelined, they get rejected, their world constantly needs them to prove themselves as strong.But you don't see boys and men going around telling everyone how they should be perceived just because they were born male. The only difference is that the girlchild's plight is being addressed every now and then, making the boychild's plight inexistent. Journalists will tell you, that tragic stories sell more and if its about a girl, voila! Jackpot!
Don't get me wrong, I am a feminist always have been, always will be. I also know that women also face their own challenges and I fully support any intitative that encourages women to grow beyond their wildest dreams. But are we doing this at the cost of the boychild? Is there no other way? Can't we all make progress without admonishing the other gender? Someone told me that feminism is already a lost cause if we fight for opportunities and sleep on them. And I totally agree.
I am writing this using my phone, so no, I can't survive a day without using this metallic thing.