La tercera voz should have been the title of this article, it is spanish for 'the third voice' ( yes I resorted to learning spanish).Now that my president in his wisdom extended the curfew by 21 days I might as well be bilingual.I also thought of doing the article in spanish,but chose to do it in the queen's language.Not that I stood a chance.
The third voice is exactly that 'The third voice'(read with a different and universal tone).I decided to put this down because sometimes I feel like a fraud.Do I belong in the writing world?,Do I have a shot?,Hell do I deserve to have a shot?.I bombard myself with this queries all the time thanks to the many writing related interviews I have watched.
In the course of this interviews one common question arises, "why did you start writing?" and the answer is almost the same 99% of the time. "I wanted to express myself", "I wanted to have a voice", "I wanted to be heard"or something along the lines of "it's an escape for me".Well...that would not be my response ,actually it's far from it.Now you see why my inquisitive self is worried.
My answer would go like this," I write because I want to,because I can.I write because I'm a journalist and that is what we do,write!" (Crude,entitled and dismissive).I believe I don't have to have a reason.I don't write because I want to be heard ( If you've met me you know I don't need to be heard ,I am heard regardless). I don't write to escape, movies and music do that for me and again what am I escaping from?.Problems? definitely not,they are part of life and are here to stay.Others just happen to have better problems than others ,but still problems.I might as well take a seat and watch a great movie like Bohemian rhapsody ( it is as good as the song too).
The voice that I hear when I ask myself this questions is the subconcious ,I prefer to call it the second voice.We all are in posession of it,we use it to read (like right now) and think and ask ourselves questions.The third voice (which is also a phrase I inculcated myself) is what I hear everyday,on television,on radio,my friends,my lecturer,my mum the list is endless.I fall into a dillema everytime I am faced with the task of discerning which one to give a listening ear to.Don't be like me.
I have gradually come to learn that taking a stand is as easy as ABC since every voice serves a different purpose.All one needs to know when to take heed,timing is key.Sometimes the subconcious wins,other times the third voice wins.The subconcious voice fully depends on your past experiences and also what your third has been feeding it.Just like the whole garbage in garbage out (GIGO) narrative.At this point,with all the encouraging pats I am getting I take it that my second voice is wrong.I refuse to self sabotage.
I do deserve a shot at this and any other thing in life (anyone does).If I eventually run out of things to write ,then and only then might I consider listening to my second voice and I will surely put up a fight (I only do verbal fights by the way). I would also look back and say I have come a long way to stop now ,and that I should keep going.
I suggest you do too,(whatever it is that you believe in).Put up a fight.Do not throw in the towel just yet and refuse to be a self sabotager.